![]() ![]() So his take is, This is extremely bad.Ĭovey’s perception automatically influences his emotions. Covey, a father of nine, puts high value on family, fathering, and discipline. Initially Covey sees the man on the subway as an irresponsible father. The way we “see” automatically influences the way we “feel,” which in turn automatically influences the way we “act.” Notice the “automatic influence” in this progression. Insight #1: When perception changes, emotion and behaviors change automatically.Ĭovey’s story reveals what I describe in my recent book as the “See-Feel-Act Progression,” a simple way to show how perception and emotion and behavior work together. Here are the insights I draw from Covey’s story…. Can you tell me about it? What can I do to help?” Everything changed in an instant. I didn’t have to worry about controlling my attitude or my behavior. And because I saw differently, I felt differently. I don’t know what to think, and I guess they don’t know how to handle it either.” We just came from the hospital where their mother died about an hour ago. “Oh, you’re right,” he said softly, “I guess I should do something about it. The man lifted his gaze as if he saw the situation for the first time. I wonder if you couldn’t control them a little more?” Eventually, with what I felt was unusual patience, I turned and said, “Sir, your children are disturbing people. ![]() I couldn’t believe he could be so insensitive. The man sat next to me and closed his eyes, apparently oblivious to his children, who were yelling, throwing things, even grabbing people’s papers. Then a man and his children entered the subway car. People were sitting quietly, reading papers, or resting with eyes closed. I was riding a subway on Sunday morning in New York. In his book The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, author Stephen Covey tells a well-known story about an incident on a subway… ![]()
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